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Fair and Balanced Backfires!  Newt Gingrich vs. The Naked Emperor on Food Stamp Lectures and Drug Testing

Fair and balanced backfires!  Newt Gingrich squares off against the man with the crown on a news show and sparks fly.  They discuss Newt’s offer to lecture the NAACP on expecting more than food stamps and The Naked Emperor proposes some provocative new ideas around drug testing welfare recipients.

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Mr. Gingrich recently you have made some offers to minorities

Specifically the offer to attend an NAACP convention to explain why African Americans “should demand paychecks and not be satisfied with food stamps.”

NG: Yes, I am offering to talk with the black community to help encourage them to expect more from themselves and from their President.

And to be Fair and Balanced, What do you make of Mr. Gingrich’s comments Sir?

TNE: Well it is difficult to understand where he gets his balls big enough, or his facts for that matter, to make such a statement.

Uh. What do you mean?

TNE: There are way more Caucasians on food stamps than African Americans. So why isn’t he offering to lecture to white people?

Excuse me please?

TNE: And Mr. Gingrich got paid somewhere between $300,000 and $1.6 Million Dollars by Freddie Mack to be a consultant. Freddie Mack was at the epicenter of the Real Estate Meltdown that financially wiped out many African Americans putting them into bankruptcy and of food stamps and now he wants to lecture them?

In your home state of Georgia a new bill was introduced that would require random drug testing for all welfare recipients. Do you agree with this idea?

NG: If they have received handouts they cannot be wasting it on drugs. Or anything else that is not improving themselves or our society..


Very well spoken sir.

And your thoughts?

TNE: If you are going to start making those who received handouts from the public take drug tests, then it would be fair to start first with those who received the largest hand outs

NG: We finally agree on some thing.

TNE: Not so fast. I believe all of the executives of the banks and Wall Street firms who received taxpayer bailout money ought to be tested for drugs

NG: Say what?

TNE: Starting with Goldman Sachs, JP Morgan Chase, and Bank of America.

Oh my God!

TNE: Test for cocaine first..


In more important news, Lindsay Lohan has agreed to pose for Playboy. Again.

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