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Vikram Pandit:  The Badass Scientist behind Citigroup and too big to fail

The too big to fail banks are really not a new concept.  They once held sway in the United States of America and roamed across the landscape like Tyrannosaurus rex…and there was much gnashing of the teeth and the people were scared.  Then there was this meteor called the New Deal and that lead to an extinction event for the too big to fail dinosaurs…Eventually, brilliant genetic scientists emerged on Wall Street.  Scientists like the astute and learned Vikram Pandit of Citigroup.

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The too big to fail banks are really not a new concept.

They once held sway in the United States of America and roamed across the landscape like Tyrannosaurus rex…and there was much gnashing of the teeth and the people were scared.

Then there was this meteor called the New Deal and that lead to an extinction event for the too big to fail dinosaurs…

And after the extinction event a whole new species arose from the ashes—the middle class.  With time this middle class proliferated and prospered, flowering the landscape with family, home purchases, and good long term jobs where one could live with dignity.  And there was one standard of law for everyone.

Then, brilliant genetic scientists emerged on Wall Street.  Scientists like the astute and learned Vikram Pandit of Citigroup.

Vikram was one of those gifted bio-engineers who recreated too big to fail dinosaurs…and set them loose upon the virgin fields of unsuspecting middle class…The rapacious dinosaurs began to consume.  They fed at will and then they fed on each other.  Vikram was pleased.  And emboldened.

Vikram and his Citigrouposuarus was so over fed that it became food drunk and stumbled into a LaBrea Tar Pit of derivatives and credit default swaps…Thankfully Vikram was able to rescue his prized creation.  In an another example of this mad scientist’s genius—Vikram got the representatives of the people to persuade them to free his Citigrouposaurus Rex from the tar pit.

And this was each achieved by the largest cash bailout ever of any dinosaur on record…and Vikram, of course, was well compensated himself to the tune of hundreds of millions of dollars…and his pet creation?  Citigrouposauras Rex?  It is now free, happy and eating everyone in sight…

Welcome to Jurassic Park.

Check out these related articles:

>Citigroup’s CEO’s Monster Pay Package While Cutting Jobs. America’s New Capitalism

>Can the Schneiderman-Infused Financial Fraud Unit Prosecute Vikram Pandit?

>Vikram Pandit Receives Massive Bonus While Citigroup Slashes Jobs



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